why do some people linger in the past with their hatred, seems like we take things for granted. I know for damn sure that things never went my way 2007 or so ago...
from the beginning I thought I had it all. Got hooked up with a girl that had two jobs, helped me gain one, making straight A's my senior year, and plenty of fucking animals around me, which I used to love but now slightly allergic?
it's coming around that time of year again that my life went into a spiraling, emotional, abyss... but I decided to celebrate it.
I met a girl right after christmas time at my job in belk over at the shoe department... some girl sitting down in a hoodie/ skirt de-socializing herself from her aunt? walked over to her an talked momentarily (she just came back from Italy) and went home happy... something possesed me to call all friends and just meeting this girl gave me such a high that I remember sitting on my 'then' girlfriend's bed and telling her about the experience....
that ruined the relationship, and my alfresco with amy turned my world upside down and I do mean alfresco.... I moved in with my friend channel and got kicked out of the home and on the street... amada helped me get a place over at smitty's (micheal) and ended up having to run away from that money laundrying caos after a single month, and got robbed... met some dudes at the bar which turned out to be the best of guys and an old family friend... threw some awesome parties and bar hopping action...
lived with marcy an ex and matt and staci's.... almost had my head bashed in with a bat while sleeping, hit a black dude with a pontiac, and got into my first and so far only accident with a harrison county city truck, full of prison birds... that almost snapped my neck... drunk nights running around gulfport and I would sleep in my school parking lot not remembering much of what happened.... got fired from my two jobs....dropped out of school. this all went down in a period of two months.
In the end I met the coolest of people and lost some good friends, and some how within all this bettered myself... I have my high school diploma, no g.e.d., and got into college... after I go to my calling?
I went through hell and back, nothing I ever did seemed good enough and I failed at everything I ever attempted that I needed to do... My sweat, my blood, my puke... led me to that girl I met at a store. That I fell in love with...
------------------------------------------------------------------------
In the end you shouldn't take everything so personal and remember how bad the past was for the moment it was but remember what you got out of it.
I know I fucked some people over and some did the same to me, shit happens for a reason and suprissingly it did.
you only get what you put in....
so I celebrate
Dain for being there at my worst
Amada for being concerned
Marcel (if I spelt that right) for picking up the pieces
Channel for the rough lovin'
Staci for making sure Im fed
Smitty for the half way house
Joe for being along side me taking the beatings of life and the shower
Justin for keeping me from falling at the seams
(the lesbians in a apartment) funny as shit, make me laugh again
Kristina (myspace chick) poored your broken heart out to me, and I did the same to you.
Teddy (I hated you) hooked me up with the girl
Jes-sica for putting logic back into my head
Brandy for talking me out of insane shit
Krystyn for taking my phone calls at 4 oclock in the morning
Brittany for the job at belk
Amy for her humor, love, and tearing my life apart
Pork Chop for robbing me
Sarah for renewing my life
anyone else I forgot I'll try to remember and I think of everyone on the list and off very fondly... Im glad to have ever met you, aquianted with, or ran into over and over again... so now I believe that the worst portions of your life is only the best if that makes any sense, so all I want you to do after reading this big ass blog...
just remember: When you see my face, I hope it gives you Hell... love you
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